


I don't care much for zombie movies

by Emeraldwhale



Category: No Fandom
Genre: Gen, Poetry, Zombie, poem, ths may or may not be a true story
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-16
Updated: 2020-02-16
Packaged: 2021-02-27 21:35:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 281
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22762558
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emeraldwhale/pseuds/Emeraldwhale
Summary: Is this a rant? Is this poetry? Is this stupid?The answer to all three is: probably.
Comments: 5
Kudos: 1





	I don't care much for zombie movies

i don’t much care for zombie movies

they leave too many questions

  * why do zombies want brains?
  * what is “undead?”
  * does it even qualify as alive?
  * how do you kill a zombie?
  * can animals be zombies?
  * what about bugs?
  * what about dinosaurs?
  * what about plants?
  * what about fungi?
  * do non human zombies thirst for all brains or just their species’ brains?
  * do animal brains satiate a zombies lust for brains?
  * how much does a person have to decompose before they can’t be undead?
  * do zombies need to procreate?
  * can you impregnate a zombie?
  * how does that work?
  * what if a baby became a zombie?
  * what happens when zombies eat brains?
  * do they have a digestive system?
  * does that mean they poop?
  * why does a bite infect a person?
  * if they’re so lethargic, then how can a zombie’s bite be strong enough to break the skin?
  * unless direct contact is enough, but then why would they be so intent on biting?
  * what’s the difference between a zombie that rose from the dead and a zombie that was infected while alive?
  * can you drown a zombie?
  * would that mean zombies need to breathe?
  * what if you put a zombie in space?
  * why specifically brains?
  * can zombies eat other things?
  * if you cure someone, do they retain their zombie memories?
  * do zombies remember before they were zombies?
  * do zombies feel pain?
  * why are they usually green or grey?
  * does this imply a lack of blood flow?
  * AKA no heartbeat?
  * how do they live without a heartbeat?
  * do their cells not need oxygen?
  * how come they still bleed when you stab them?
  * why are they so slow?



i'm not allowed back at the movie theater.


End file.
